There is never a dull moment in marriage. Add a few soul sucking minions to the mix and it can become a powder keg for an all out war...
Just kidding...well....sort of...🤷
But in all honesty, marriage can be tricky sometimes, especially when you marry someone as opinionated and strong willed as you are. As much as I love my husband to death, he can drive me freaking nuts 80-90% of the time. (I'm sure I drive him crazy just the same) We make an incredible and unbeatable team, but our bickering can be just as unbeatable. We could probably make bickering an Olympic event, and we would 100% take home the gold....🙄💯
So I've been thinking lately about some of our more repetitive arguments.. What are they about? How do we stop the vicious cycle? How do we anticipate and deescalate these fights? I'll let you know when I figure it out...
But until then, here are 5 arguments you'll more than likely have with your spouse after you have kids:
1. Who will put the kids to bed
I love my toddler, but I definitely ain't sad when she goes to bed...and I'm DEFINITELY not sad when it's Daddy's turn to put that chick to bed. Every night my husband and I play the game of "nose goes" when it comes time for night night. More times than not I win, but there is still plenty of time spent nightly going back and forth about who's turn it is, and who did bedtime the night before... We've actually just recently started doing a tag team bedtime routine and it's going surprisingly well... Can't argue if we're both losing bedtime roulette. 🤷
2. Good cop/Bad Cop
Now that we have a threenager, we've been caught up in the good cop/bad cop disagreement... Do we spank? Do we not spank? We debate time outs and how to issue punishments. We go round and round and round. The hubs thinks a no nonsense approach to parenting is the way to go, while sometimes I'm not so sure... Ugh.. sometimes I feel like my head could explode... 9 times out of 10 I'm definitely the softy of the situation...but yet somehow my kid still likes my husband more than me... I will never understand it 🤦
It all comes back to money. I hate it, I really do, but it's the truth. Even people without kids argue about money. It's just a part of life. But add a few fabulously dressed and spoiled kiddos, and you have the perfect storm for a heated argument. Meanwhile, I'm wearing yoga pants that I've had since high school whilst having said argument....Kids make you do ridiculous and irrational things... What can I say? The only thing I've learned about this argument, is to discuss purchases with your spouse before making them.... Or hide the purchases really well... Ignorance is bliss, right?
Sleep is a scarce part of Parenthood. Especially quality sleep. It's amazing what an uninterrupted night of sleep can do for your soul, which is why we fight for them passionately. When kiddo wakes up in the middle of the night, a sick game of who can pretend they are still sleeping until the other person gives up ensues. I have to give myself mad props, I am a dedicated and very experienced player of the game. I actually win most times... But I still make sure to throw my hubby a bone every now and again and let him get some shut eye too. It's all about balance people. All about balance...
I'm going to try to put this as eloquently and demurely as possible. Sex is literally one of the last things I'm into these days. Who has time for that?!? I've got a house to run, family to take care of, job to work...ain't nobody got time for that...and the time that I do have, I plan to spend laying on the couch or in my bed trying to maintain my sanity... Hubs though... He is all about the deed, any time, all the time... Which is super amazing in itself... He watched my birth our 10 pound child whilst pooping in front of strangers...and he's still down to pound... I'm flattered... But sorry...boy bye... Maybe tomorrow, or next week, or next year.... Or maybe when I'm finally ready for another baby... I'll get back to you on that....#sorrynotsorry
What are some of the typical arguments you have with your spouse?