Once your children hit toddlerhood, it is a whole new ball game. Everything you thought that you knew about raising well rounded children goes right out the window, and suddenly you're in the wild wild west... The great unknown...I swear sometimes I can't tell if I am a passenger on the crazy train, or if I'm the conductor yelling, "FULL SPEED AHEAD!".
With a toddler there is always some new chaos to be discovered or a new mess to be found. It's funny because even though each day presents some new variation of parenting horrors, there are also certain things that you can bank on occuring. 🤷
So here are 5 things that will happen almost daily while raising a toddler:
1. Your house will constantly look like a state of emergency has been declared
Just accept it... I promise you it is much less painful if you just embrace the mess. I tried to fight it for a while, but my toddler beat me into submission, and I've just resigned to the fact that my house won't be clean again until my kid is in college....and by then I'll probably be too old to even care...I've just made myself accustomed to the sound of play food being dumped mercilessly about, and become immune to the intense pain of stepping on building blocks. 🤷
2. You'll only understand every 5th word or so
I honestly need an interpreter to decode the things my kiddo says to me. Especially when she is super pissed or super excited. She jibber-jabbers a mile a minute and I can only decipher about every 5th word or so... On an honest side note, I love how every day she masters a new word or phrase. On a terrified note, I REALLY need to watch my mouth. It will be a miracle if this child doesn't pick up on my potty mouth... 😳 Definitely something I need to work harder on...
3. Poop will be announced
It's not a normal day with a toddler until you've wrestled a dirty diaper off or chased after a smelly child while they frantically try to hide to avoid changing time. I'll never get it... Why would anyone want to sit in their own pee...or moreover, why would anyone want to sit in their own crap?!? Why these fights happen I'll never know, but I've really improved my reflexes and endurance by chasing my poopy kid around. I think we are approaching time to potty train though... My kiddo now screams "POOP!" to me repeatedly after she's done the deed. Stay tuned folks...
4. Cooking will be a game of chance
Every meal is a struggle. Will I get it right the first time today? Will I cook 5 different meals tonight? Will ANY of the foods I prepared be chosen? I swear I can't keep up. One day my kid will only eat peanut butter, the next day peanut butter is repulsive. It can be so infuriating. Every so often I get it right, but more times than not, the meals I prepare end up in the trash or the dog bowl...
5. Every single thing becomes a negotiation
What ever happened to not negotiating with terrorist?!? EVERY SINGLE LITTLE MINUTE THING IS A NEGOTIATION. "If you eat this, you can have that". "If you let me change you, you can have this". "If you behave, you can do this". Don't get me wrong, I am DEFINITELY not above bribery and hard bargaining, but damn it gets annoying sometimes... I think my kiddo is going to grow up to be in politics... Or maybe a hostage negotiator...
BONUS: You'll be strangely impressed by at least one thing your kid does per day.
The toddler stage is horrifying, but it's also amazing. Every single day, our kiddos learn new things. Each day is full of milestones and newly learned skills. Today for example, my kiddo said "I love you Dad" before my husband left for work. My heart exploded like a nuclear bomb and I could've cried tears of joy and died at the same time. 😍😍😍😍
Toddlers.... Can't live with them, can't live without them....